Enough already

It's obvious why the tabloid press spends so much time focusing on Britney Spears. She's a colossal train wreck of the absolute highest magnitude, the kind of cautionary tale that makes everyone else in the world breathe a sigh of relief and thank God they don't have her problems. She's just like some woman living in a trailer in Appalachia who won the Powerball and now can spend every day going to Starbucks and not working. It's baffling that she managed to have two kids despite having the maternal instincts of a wet towel. And so forth.

But do you think it can stop being news when 85 paparazzi crowd around her car, taking pictures and blinding her with flashes, and then something happens?

TMZ caught Brit at the Four Seasons in Beverly Hills, where the drivin' popwreck was surrounded by photogs as she made her way into the parking lot. The paps refused to move, despite several warnings and documented footage of how Britney rolls. Moments later, Brit shockingly rolled her new wheels over a guy's foot.

Honestly, if there's anyone in the world I have less sympathy for than Britney Spears, it's the people whose only job is to crowd around her car just waiting for her to do something dumb. I have an idea, guy: maybe don't get so close to the car that the tire could roll over your foot? It reminds me of that old State Farm ad that annoyed Alma, because in it the woman rolls over her husband's foot in the car and the ad is all, "Ha ha, stupid women drivers," but really, why was the guy standing with his foot under the wheel right as she was trying to back out of the driveway?

I mean, really. She shockingly ran over his foot? I don't think so. Hell, just look at this story, which implicitly blames Britney for a guy getting hit by a car. And what, exactly, was that guy doing?

Several cars were in line chasing the pop princess when one hit another photog on a motorcycle, throwing the rider off the bike and onto the road. We're told the rider was seriously injured and transported to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center. His current condition is unknown.

UPDATE: We're told that the injured person is what is known as a "spotter," and does not actually carry a camera. He will follow the star and tip off other photographers to her whereabouts.

So he's a professional stalker? I know that public figures have to give up certain assumptions of privacy, but how is this nonsense even legal? Also note that Britney had nothing to do with the accident except that it involved multiple idiots chasing her, but the article runs with a picture of her looking crazy as usual, so the casual reader is likely to think, "Britney's at it again!"

Sorry to go all Chris Crocker on you there. But I think we've reached the saturation point with this stuff. Does the media really not have anything better to do?